The most precious right you have...

...is the right to thought.  It's a right that many people around the world don't have the freedom to express.

Think of your right to thought as an all-you-can-eat buffet (without calories!), a buffet that makes you healthier and happier the more you indulge.  It's your right, dang it!  Exercise that right for all it's worth.  You exercise your right to free speech, to freedom of religion...exercise your right to thought just as vigorously.

Most if not all of us have heard the expression, "use it or lose it."  It's an expression that applies to muscles you build up when you exercise; if you don't keep using those muscles, they atrophy.  The expression applies to rights as well.  If you don't exercise your right to thought, you put yourself in danger of losing it, either by your own volition or someone else's.

So many of us adopt for our own the opinions and beliefs of the people in whom we've decided to place our trust: parents, friends, clergy, or sometimes television and radio personalities.  My advice to you is to never, never adopt an opinion or belief as your own without picking it to pieces and analyzing every scrap first.

You're independent, right? With your own thoughts, opinions, and beliefs, each one adopted because it represents what you, in your deepest heart, believe to be right and true?

Are you really?

I invite you to undertake two exercises:

First--and you may have heard of this before; it was taught to me by a woman I respect--take account of your beliefs.  Pick a topic, any topic.  Then write down all your beliefs about that topic. Don't censor, just let them all come flowing out on the page. Then go back and re-read what you've written. How many of those beliefs conflict? How many of those beliefs, on re-read, feel wrong to you? Try to determine where each of those beliefs came from. How many came from you, and how many did you adopt--without thought--from someone in a position of authority, someone you trusted?

That's not to say, of course, that the people who shared with you their beliefs and thoughts were trying to force you to think and believe as they do. They may have been, but chances are much greater that they wanted to share with you what they believe is right and true.  Your responsibility, then, is to try those beliefs and opinions on for size before you add them to your belief wardrobe.  If they fits, great.  If they need some alteration, great.  If they don't work for you, great; toss them out.  If someone doesn't respect your right to adopt the beliefs that you truly believe as opposed to what they want you to believe, resolve that in the way that works best. You may just need to talk it out; you may need to release that person from your life, or you may choose to avail yourself of some other remedy.

Your second exercise is to (most likely) change the way you listen.  When someone is sharing with you a belief or opinion, listen. Just listen. It's common for us to let the sound pass over us while we formulate a response.  Don't think about what you're going to say; don't agree or disagree yet.  Just listen.  After you listen, take some time to ponder what you heard. Consider it. Measure it; weigh it. Try it on for size. As above, if it fits, needs alteration, or doesn't work, handle it accordingly.

If you're engaged in a back-and-forth conversation, this approach still works.  Listen to what the other person has to say, and then ask them to give you a few moments to process what they've said.  We tend to feel that we have to respond immediately, but we don't; we don't need to hold ourselves to someone else's timetable and sell ourselves short of the opportunity to consider our own opinions and thoughts on the matter.  Process, then respond.  If someone keeps plowing on without giving you the chance to process, stop them. Tell them that you listened to what they had to say without passing judgement or formulating a response as they were speaking because you respect their opinion, to please give you some time to give what they said the due consideration it deserves.  If they don't agree to let you have that time, that may be an indication of how much their opinion deserves consideration.

Exercise your right to thought. It's your most precious right.  When you exercise it, you allow yourself to be yourself in heart, mind, and spirit. Don't let anyone else tell you who you are, what you think, or what you believe.  That's not their right; it's yours. Use it or lose it.